Reviews

COCAINE BEAR Review

Cocaine Bear has its entertaining moments but overall, it doesn’t live up to its righteously hilarious title.

"Cocaine Bear" (2023) featured image

Attempting to write a review on a movie with the title COCAINE BEAR feels almost pointless. I mean…How does one do that? Sharing an opinion on a gleefully self-aware film like this is sort of like trying to review SNAKES ON A PLANE or SHARKNADO. Even the title of this movie is so on-the-nose, you pretty much know what you’re in for when you buy a ticket and for a lot of viewers, that will be enough. That said, this is a review, so…I’ll do my best to properly convey my personal thoughts where it pertains to this high-concept, 1980s-set movie from director, Elizabeth Banks (PITCH PERFECT 2, CHARLIE’S ANGELS), without sounding like a total killjoy.

Loosely based on a true story (the operative word being “loosely!”), COCAINE BEAR finds a handful of various colorful individuals having run-ins with a massive black bear in the middle of the woods. But this isn’t just any black bear. No, this crazed wild animal has consumed a large amount of cocaine. Where this cocaine came from isn’t particularly relevant only to say that there’s so much of the white stuff, that said bear has developed a real taste for it.  The individuals that come into contact with this animal include a mother (Kerri Russell) looking for her lost-in-the-wilderness daughter (Brooklyn Prince), an affable drug dealer (O’Shea Jackson Jr.) and his emotionally distraught best friend (Alden Ehrenreich), a gangster (the late Ray Liotta) looking to get his product back, an at-the-end-of-his-rope police officer (Isaiah Whitlock Jr.), an out-to-prove-her-worth park ranger (Margo Martindale), and a trio of hooligans (Aaron Holliday, J.B. Moore, and Leo Hanna) who spend their days causing mischief amongst visiting tourists and the locals.

As you probably gathered by the title and synopsis, COCAINE BEAR is a comedy. It certainly has horror elements but…It’s more interested in making viewers laugh by way of random (and ridiculous) humor and a journey through the absolutely absurd. Disappointingly, though, as was the case with Willow in the recent Disney+ series of the same name, the bear in question often feels more like a mere supporting character in what’s supposed to be her own movie.  This is to say that Banks is often more interested in shifting the action back and forth between a handful of colorful individuals who each have their own little missions to accomplish.  This might have paid off to a stronger effect had all of these characters brought the funny at a quicker clip and had there not been so many of these characters to speak of.

"Cocaine Bear" (2023) featured image

Of the individuals we meet throughout the film, it’s Ehrenreich, Martindale, and Whitlock Jr. who fare best. At the very least, they have the funniest bits in the movie. A generally delightful Russell is given very little to do in this picture and that’s disappointing because she’s quite a talent. Likewise, the late, great Liotta is also squandered. He’s charismatic to be sure but rather than exploiting what could have been a funny ongoing gag in which his gangster, Syd, must take care of a youngster back home, Banks and her screenwriter Jimmy Warden opt to bring him to the woods in the final act in an effort to aid others in pursuing the bear at the heart of the plot, and honestly, it’s a rather routine and uninspired direction to take this particular character.

Listen, I’m a Banks fan. I love her personality and I love her energy and it would stand to reason that both of these attributes would make for a goofy comedy that’s as endearing as it is silly. Sadly, that’s not really the case here. There are a couple of entertaining set pieces, including a zany one involving an ambulance, but despite the buzzed-about title, COCAINE BEAR, this movie is not as consistently funny as one might hope. The movie does tend to lull a bit and many of the gags don’t land. What’s more, there are simply too many characters, most of whom don’t really contribute a whole lot to the film, overall.

It should also be noted that COCAINE BEAR isn’t quite as bonkers as that bigger-than-life title would suggest and honestly, it meanders more than it engages. Beyond that, the CG nature of the bear itself and the cartoony gore effects drain the attack scenes of tension. I get this is a comedy and that’s by design but had this thing had more of a visceral kick with the bear attacks it might have taken things up a notch. That approach certainly worked for horror/comedy masterworks like AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON.

In COCAINE BEAR, the proceedings play a little more like “Yogi Bear” if Yogi had a craving for blow rather than picnic baskets. For some, I suspect the very idea of that will be enough to take this film to cult status but for me personally, it just wasn’t consistently funny enough. In the end, this movie’s strongest attributes are its title, a few bright spots amongst the cast, and a lively soundtrack featuring Devo frontman Mark Mothersbaugh at the helm.

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